the time has come for aarushi to put another ring in the ol’ 🌴 and so there is occasion for us to be cuckoo as we kiki!

i’m throwing a BIRTHDAY SHOW 🎂🎤 that is also a BENEFIT 💸✨ for taking my show EMOJI 🤷🏽‍♀️ to Edinburgh Fringe this August 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🎭✨

I— Aarushi (@aarushifire) 💁🏽‍♀️🔥 — am assembling an assortment of the finest comics 🎭, musicians 🎶 & scholars 🧠

to engage in:
✨ BIRTHDAY BITS 🤪
✨ soul-defining emotionality ❤️‍🩹
✨ existential inquiry 🧐
and many will take the [brief] time to answer the question… how in one minute can we fix the world?

JUDY PEACH 🍑 + HEATHER DANIELSEN 👱🏻‍♀️
→ leading a magnificent stuff-we-found-in-our-apartments auction 🪧🏺🕯️
→ AND blessing us with hilarious & haunting musical talents 🎶

ANNAM CHOUDHRY 🤯 + KENDALL DAVIS ☮️ + RAQUEL PALMAS 🪴
→ taking the mic to do some stand-up🎤
→ attempting to tickle our withered, world-weary hearts 🫀🥹

from the likes of:

HANASARA 🌸
PAULSON JOHN 🎸

& maybe even Aarushi 🤭
but like idk don’t make me sing i’m so shy 🙈🎤

✨ SLAYSIANS ✌🏽🔥

✨ UCB’s SIBLINGS 🧑‍🧑‍🧒‍🧒✨

Annie Moretto
Ella Zafra
Blaise Vacca
Adam Manno
Grace Delsohn
Hope Cary
Seynique Smythe
Gabriel Lonning
George Srouji
Seann Cantatore
Jatin Chhugani
EJ Casabal
…& MORE!!! 🎉🎉🎉.

it’s gauche to say, but taking my show EFF is going to cost upwards of $10k without the flight! if you can’t make the show, you can send along any donations via venmo or zelle @aarushifire or let me know if there’s something else you’d like to try! 💸

things [the world + my life + the weather + edinburgh + new york city + global politics + my phone + the absolutely ROTTED era we live in] have been driving me up a f*cking wall.

attempting to secure a performance space in Edinburgh for august while we endure all this insane geopolitical bullshit and a mercury retrograde 🔄 has NOT been a walk in the park. furthermore i think we need to stop romanticizing walks in the park. that’s like, where everyone walks. 🚶🏽‍♀️

here’s a sexy little fractal of the rejections i’ve faced. i knew something was wrong when i was rejected by a venue i thought would be thrilled to book me — MY SHOW DID SELL OUT ITS RUN IN NYC— ONE OF THE MOST DIFFICULT MARKETS BUT WHATEVER — then i panic-applied to like 10 more venues — and i got some offers i did not love — then my friend sent me a picture of a mutilated mango 🥭 we were supposed to eat together so then i cried on the subway. then i followed up with venues to tell them about my offers — and got rejected by about 4 more venues (one of which was rejecting me for a second time due to a software error 🥈) — and in the middle of that i got rejected from a writing opportunity i spent about 10 hours last month prepping video interview responses for — then my mentor told me my writing sample wasn’t quite right for the opportunity— and in conclusion I’M GOING TO WRITE AN actually-funny SITCOM BY APRIL 22ND. just 20 days after my birthday. HINT.

hanasara (who’s performing on april 19th at pine box 🎶 RSVP) has a song that says “🎶fall down seven/ get up eight🎶” that gets stuck in my head whenever i’m trying my hardest.

i’ve had a lot of pretty incredible triumphs — but i’m more proud of how i’ve shown up for myself in the face of fear, discomfort and adversity 🧖🏽‍♀️

even in my darkest moments the universe has always taken care of me. i was once considering leaving the city because i was broke and so sad — and then i qualified for a guaranteed income program for artists which sent me $1000 a month for the next 18 months.

a few years ago i was dealt a devastating romantic blow that brought up all my deepest insecurities — and the universe sent me not 1 but about 15 different (genuinely hot) people who found me like, irresistible (?) like THAT week. like i was like “oh i’m worthless no one will ever love me,” meanwhile this literal model (i mean i’m sure they were lacking in other ways) was sending me pictures of myself being like “you look stunning here.” my friends were like “WHICH IS IT, AARUSHI?!”

i was forced to contend with the reality that the mean-to-myself conclusions i was so tempted to draw about my rejection were unfounded.

last january, i complained to my friend andrea coleman about how finding a producer and circulating a google form “was scary.” and she said, “yes, you’re going to feel afraid, and then you’re going to do it anyway.”

the other day, i was waffling about following up with someone and my friend nikki said, “you’re only bound by your own shame,” and then i was like.. yeah i guess it would be dumb to let shame stop me now when i’ve already been SUCH a weirdo on main.

i guess i’m telling you this because i want you to know that i’m being rejected. i want you to know that i’m trying really hard. i’m putting myself out there enough to experience real human reject-y feelings.

it’s happening so much that i almost don’t even have time to get upset about it. ALMOST. i don’t want you to think for one second that i’m cool, and chill, and that i don’t feel like a loser.

but feeling like a loser isn’t fatal.

the last time i sent you an email, one of my dearly respected comedy teachers UNSUBSCRIBED 💀…like look who’s famous in the inbox 💁🏽‍♀️, i’m annoying enough to be turned off. to be annoying is to be SEEN and KNOWN, hamdillah.

on SUCH LITTLE SLEEP, i figured out my venue sitch. i’m going to edinburgh. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿✨

and it wouldn’t have been possible had i not understood when i did that some of my top venues didn’t rank me at the top — which is insane if you’ve seen my show — but the Brits don’t exactly have a tasteful track record with people like me.

👉🏽 if you want to help send this show to scotland, the MOST FUN WAY is to come to my birthday benefit show 🎂🎤

i need you all to understand that me even sending you this email has been a huge accomplishment for which i have shown up super imperfectly.

i am so lucky that my gorgeous and supportive fellow Abhi Alwar — author of Super Pancake, designer, aries, angel 😇— did the heavy lifting to make this iconic poster — then i massaged it in canva and there was a happy ending!! it was a hot collab 🔥 what can we say?

i’ve been having a download lately about sitting inside of uncomfortable, dark, annoying moments 🕳️🪏

i feel them. oh god, i feel them. they annoy the hell out of me. 😱

but no one is coming to save me from my annoyance/discomfort/uncertainty/anxiety

— except for like, EVERYONE…
my friend abhi
15 random hotties
a yes from an application i forgot about
the bridge of a song
birds chirping out of my window
a funny random thought that’s not funny enough to be a bit
2 minutes of deep breathing
another wave crashing onto the shore 🌊

🎶THERE’S ALWAYS GONNA BE ANOTHER MOUNTAIN… ⛰️🎶 ..etc.

so in an attempt to get saved, i called people. i stalked people on socials. i used the wayback machine. 👻 i cold-DMed to get intel. i made diagrams to understand confusing space-descriptions from overworked bookers. i called the top venue on my list (at a normal UK hour) and told them i was calling to make their decision easier.

i realized the only way out of my predicament was to sit with myself and my discomfort.. i cursed under my breath as i waited for the fog to clear and for mercury to station direct. that’s kind of the whole thing.

the only other option is literally to rot on our phones until we rot into the ground… 🧟‍♀️🤳🏻

like those are the option: be comfortably vacant, or get up in there with everything that scares and annoys you. 🛌 🪱

the solution to anxiety is taking action. I KNOW IT’S SO ANNOYING.

so idk i guess i told you all this because i need you to understand that i am an olympian (in the aarushi doing hard things category)🚴🏽. you do NOT understand how much a feat it was that AMIDST THIS DEEP MID-WINTER, i found within myself an invincible summer the strength of a pinky finger to book the show to raise money for a Edinburgh show-run i truly did not believe would happen. it’s going to be an absolutely SLAY DIVA THE HOUSE DOWN BOOTS show and i cannot wait for you to be a part of it.

i told myself while i was booking it that no matter what happened with the venue, we could celebrate. it would mean the world 🌍 to me if you came to see my amazing friends _{(& me)} perform 🥰 don’t forget to RSVP here. 💌 if you’re not able to come, please consider sending me a donation. and also please somebody explain to me what the drama is with chappell roan. i haven’t had time. 🩷